putting down the rope

i’m having one of those days where i just want to hide myself
sitting in this coffee shop with a bare face
no sunglasses or hat to hide my eyes
i feel like a sitting duck
like someone is just waiting to sit down next to me
and ask me if i’m doing ok
and i won’t have the strength to give the perfunctory response
i’m fine thanks
i’ll choke on it as it rises in my throat
and instead of words a sound will escape
guttural and raw
the bearings of my soul that have longed to escape
all because i could not hide my face